2/2/24
Its nighttime and BB has a tree house in my parents backyard. When you go inside, there’s a hatch on the ceiling that gives you access to a scope, almost like you’d get on a submarine, and it allows you to see off into the distance. As we’re in the treehoise, we see these kids come by in this crazy, futuristic-lookomg flying car. There are two guys in the front seats, I believe, and two hot girls in the back.
At some point I get separated by my family and get held up in this building near the treehouse. I have something like a CB radio and I thought I heard my father’s voice. I try to think what my call sign would be, and decide on Bald Eagle. As I’m considering what my father’s would be, someone interrupts my chain of thought.
I’m uncertain if the following was part of the same dream or an altogether different one, but I’m feeling angry, so I go into the art room — like the old art room back in high school — to gather paints with the intention of going to paint in the woods. As I’m doing so, my mother comes in the door, approaching me, wanting to talk. She tells me she’s experienced strange things throughout her life, too. I sense she’s trying to connect with me, but I just won’t have it.
“No,” I tell her. “You had your chance to listen to my experiences. I’m going into the woods alone.”
She then leaves, and K.B. comes in the door. Sge gives me one of her epic, rejuvenating hugs. As she does so, I feel something wet on my thumb, and look down to realize I’ve gotten this sky blue paint on her. It’s smeared on my thumb. She hugs me tighter and neither of us let go as we just glide down the street. At the end of the street, in a yard, there is a sign that says, “No Smoking,” and my sense is that it’s in reference to weed. She assures me the sign is just sarcasm. She wants me to come with her to go see someone, though I don’t recall who.
In another dream, my parent’s black shepard is staying over at my apartment and he someone finds a white ball by the lamp in the corner of the room. Looking outside, I think to myself that I shoukd get him a leash so that at the very least he can play in the grassy area outside my apartment complex. My father buys some dog food fir me to feed him and I realize how expensive it woukd be to own a pet.
2/9/24
This girl — who is at once NB, a girl I knew from high school, and KAA, an ex-girlfriend’s cousin — hangs out with us and asks me if she can touch my face like she did “that one time.” I allow it, closing my eyes as she does so. She touches my face very lightly, very seductively. It’s incredibly relaxing and hypnotic. I fall asleep but remain aware and I can hear myself snoring.
In another dream, one of the apartments my friends are staying in was flooded. The maintenance guys arrive, all wearing blue coveralls, and one of them looks at me strangely. He had trained me, but I’d quit the job.
The situation with the flooding almost feels like an apocalyptic scenario, as people collect themselves into groups. My group was planning on taking a trip somewhere, but we’re all in the kitchen when my paternal grandmother calls it off in a very dramatic, over-the-top fashion. She’s freaking out. She then calls some man on the phone and tells him how she thinks she may have touched or ate some food to which she had an allergic reaction.
2/10/24
Went out with KM to some place, doing yoga and rubbing each other’s backs. I needed cigarettes, Circle K had closed. Walk all over town. When I come back, I don’t see her. I see JW in dreads. I also see MM, who is celebrating her birthday, but it’s not November, so I’m confused but say happy birthday anyway.
Eventually I end up sharing bed with girl I’m not initially attracted to but sge flirts and cuddles with me. She says that if her kids wake up to act natural, like we weren’t doing anything. Later she takes off her shirt and her body looks like a ripped man’s abs and it immedeately turned me off, disgusted me. A guy nearby the bed sitting on a chair looks at her looking at herself in mirror and goes, “You’re hot.”
Her kids are three girls, one of whom is mentally retarded.
I go into a closet and put on a Johnny the Homicidal Maniac T-shirt at some point.
2/11/24
In this short dream scene, I see the upper legs and vagina of a girl, as if she’s laying down and spread for me on a table. I’m about to stick it in her when I decide to instead lick around her inner thighs before doing so. She thanks me.
2/12/24
I woke up to the sound of music. I got up out of bed, ran into my living room, and turned off my phone by my laptop — but it hadn’t happened in my home reality. This was a false awakening.
2/13/24
KH, the general manager at work, comes over. Evidently we’re celebrating Christmas, even though it’s not Christmas. I feel bad because I hadn’t been informed abd so didn’t get anyone gifts, though I notice she had gotten me one.
2/15/24
I’m talking to Jon Stewart, telling him I liked his show in Apple, but that he’s at his best on The Daily Show. He kept turning everything into a joke when I was trying to have serious conversation with him and compliment him, though, and it got frustrating.
Elsewhere, we’re at work when BR asks me if I want her to make me a list of girls — presumably those I should have sex with. She says that she’ll do it so long as she can be on the list. Then she starts kissing me. They’re just pecks on the lips, but she keeps doing it again and again. It’s nice. She’s still at it when my alarm awakens me.
2/17/24
I’m walking around a dog on a leash, and at one point the caveman — one of the troublesome regulars at work — pets my dog, but there’s a boundary between us, and I begrudgingly let him.
There was a point in the dream where I was in some town and just sat down on a curb. I just felt myself inside and realized that I had never achieved the maturity others at my age or even far younger had. They had let go of childhood, sacrificed all those qualities and immersed themselves in the outer world, chasing relationships and careers, worrying about taking the kids to school, keeping up with oil changes for their vehicle. Me, I just had no desire for any of that. It’s like they had additions, external structures I didn’t have, and I felt that sense of being immature, so far behind, like I’d just fucked up what could have been and it was too late now.
2/18/24
It’s the apocalypse. There was something about kids from a clone facility, but I’m not sure if that was the cause.
People rushed the markets. I’m there with KH, my store manager from work, and I grab two boxes of granola bars.
“Why?” She asks.
“Protein,” I tell her, stuff it in my shirt, and exit the door. Despite it being the end of the workd and all, I still feel guilty fir stealing, I tell her.
I pack up my things and I’m on a plane for awhile. Some areas are trashed, others are not. The bathroom was trashed, but I had to pee. Afterward I discovered that one of the boxes wasn’t granola but these sugary bars.
There is a large group of us outside, on the move. There are black guys with berets and large guns marching in front, and we’re either behind or to the side. I suddenly think of RB, who’s probably held up at home. As a prepper person, he’s made for this. A while back, he said he’d accept me as part of his group but I don’t think he’d accept my group and I can’t just abandon them.
2/19/24
In a building, a robot turns on, picks up a metal drum and opens it. I am inside. I had been put in suspended animation during a zombie apocalypse, and as I exit the littered building, I see zombies still wriggling on nooses.
I’m outside when a large, humanoid alligator-person dressed in cloths appears behind me, and he looks frightening, but when I turn to face him he instantly transforms into a small alligator no bigger than my hand. I then put him in a plastic container and he turns into this purple liquid.
2/24/24
I’m arguing with my mother, screaming at her in a rage.
3/2/24
It’s nighttime. The blackest of conceivable black. Cloudless and entirely absent of light pollution during the deepest, most dead hours of night.
My family and I are just outside my parents’ house, and I’m meandering about their beautiful, rural property, watching the crystalline clear night sky, bathing in its cosmic beauty. I think it was the eldest of my two younger sisters, the middle child, that first drew our attention to them: these strange lights above, dancing in the heavens. As soon as all our eyes were brought to the skies, they began producing these bizarre, hypnotic displays. Veering across the full length of the property, they executed these breathtaking aerobatics and luminous, seemingly miraculous acts in this grand light show far above our silly, dumbstruck heads.
All of us are utterly captivated. We watch them with increasing enthusiasm and elevating, entranced attention, drawn into their ominous and unearthly beauty. Investing more focus than we would if we were witnessing something even as awesome as a meteor shower, fireworks display, or those heavenly, truly illuminating lighting storms above the forest lining the front yard that we always enjoyed observing from the safety of the garage, from out its open door, when my sisters and I were young.
After an enduring period of total psychological absorption, I finally break from the trace long enough to realize how important it is to document this profound experience. How mindless I had been until this moment. Until now. So I grab my phone, open it, tap video, and try to record the astounding, otherworldly light display that our eyes had for so long been permitted to behold.
Yet I simply couldn’t catch it. However much I tried, I always seemed to fail. It was so real, but yet again, I had no documentation. Nothing even approximating substantial evidence. Nothing tangible to hold onto.
And with that frustration, the dream ended.
Chronicles of a Madman. 